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lyrics "King Missile - Detachable Penis"

 
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Artist express:King Missile
Album:Happy Hour
Release year:1992

I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
Its detachable.
This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home, when I think its gonna get me in trouble,
Or I can rent it out, when I dont need it.
But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
And the next morning I cant for the life of me
Remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldnt find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
They hadnt seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
Cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time.
So I told them if it pops up to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
But they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really dont like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man,
And I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house,
And calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
So I went to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.
Then, as I walked down Second Avenue towards St. Marks Place,
Where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
Next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.
I took it home, washed it off,
And put it back on. I was happy again. Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
But I dont know.
Even though sometimes its a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.
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